Mid-life job crisis! - Triumph Bobber Forum
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post #1 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-03-2018, 04:53 PM Thread Starter
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Mid-life job crisis!

Ever just feel like jacking it all in, selling everything and retiring to a low cost area of the world... with some good roads for ride outs of course?!

Iíve hit a wall... I canít carry on doing what Iím currently doing, (I basically work in property) as itís driving me crazy and I think lead to ill health.

Iíve been looking for escape options... different career paths but Iím obviously conscious of the fact that I do in reality need to earn decent money.

Anyone here or been here before?!
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post #2 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-03-2018, 05:05 PM
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Yes, currently working offshore in oil and gas and the company I work for are massacring our terms and conditions, not a happy place to be. Currently retraining (off my own back) as a software developer in my time off, hopefully get something at the end of it.
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post #3 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-03-2018, 05:19 PM
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I hear you Mike, all too well,

From my experience the only thing stopping you is fear. Fear of loosing security, fear of the unknown, fear of taking a risk.

My advice would be just get rid of everything not important and take a chance.

Almost fourteen years ago I did just that. I sold my bike, car, gave up my job and with no more than two backpacks and very little cash, I jumped on a plane left the UK to spend the summer with my sister here in the US. I had no idea what I was doing or what the future held.

Long story short; I found the girl of my dreams who shares my values and views. We both work separately for ourselves, don't earn a great deal and don't own much. However we have our freedom, don't answer to a boss, have no debts and the icing on the cake... I bought my Bobber with cash this year.

Friends/family have no idea how we do it, to be honest I don't either but somehow life comes together and we feel like it's 'our' life. Would we want more? Yes of course we would but that's not the point.

Find someone you love, something you love to do or somewhere you love to be, take a jump, just do it and it will likely all work out for the best. Taking that jump and throwing caution to the wind was hands down the scariest but best thing I have ever done.

Good luck my friend, it's Your life, so do what feels right to you.


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Last edited by Roy; 09-03-2018 at 05:21 PM.
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post #4 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-03-2018, 06:14 PM
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Originally Posted by Mike J Commo View Post
Ever just feel like jacking it all in, selling everything and retiring to a low cost area of the world... with some good roads for ride outs of course?!

Iíve hit a wall... I canít carry on doing what Iím currently doing, (I basically work in property) as itís driving me crazy and I think lead to ill health.

Iíve been looking for escape options... different career paths but Iím obviously conscious of the fact that I do in reality need to earn decent money.

Anyone here or been here before?!
I think the writing is pretty much on the wall when you say that your job is destroying any happiness in your life.
Might be time to pack it in, take 3 steps back and look more clearly at where you want to be.
From what I gather from you on the forum you seem like a very switched on and amicable person, so i imagine you already have a few ideas in your head with regards to if/when/how you can leave your current job.
Itís amazing when things work out like with Roy (I REALLY enjoyed reading your story, Roy) but there should be a ďplan BĒ just in case it doesnít pan out.

From a personal standpoint, Iíve always gone with my gut. When it was time to make a change, I did and as Roy said - life has a way of working out (albeit with ups and downs along the way !)

I wish you the best and hope you find the path youíre looking for.
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post #5 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-03-2018, 09:11 PM
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Normally, my advice (and I get asked a lot considering I packed it in pretty early), is to go towards something and not run away from anything. I think that applies to jobs, where to live and life in general. However, it does have to be balanced with your mental health and if the current situation is really getting to you, then it could be time. But, I don't think you just want to wake up one morning and say "now what?" Especially if you have financial or other responsibilities.

My wife and I call it reinvention. We've done it four times, now. When we've felt we were "done" with our location, we had already picked out where we wanted to be next, well in advance. We didn't lose friends, just gained a whole lot more and discovered new things, places and people. That said, we did that after leaving our careers at relatively early ages (for us, not for most of you guys who are considerably younger). Although we were pretty financially stable, it worked out even better in the ensuing years. New opportunities presented themselves.

One last point on big life decisions like this. Our thinking about "what's next" always started a couple of years prior so we had a target. If you don't have one, you not only don't know which direction to go but, you may not even be sure when you get there. If you're lucky (or smart) like Roy, not having a plan may work out fine as long as you're outgoing, know how to make connections with people and are generally open to new opportunities when they come across your path. So, think about what you really like to do, what turns you on and what you're really good at that could point you in the right direction.

Good luck with all of this. It's a big step but, could be the first step of the best thing that happens to you.

p.s. based on what I recall about your physical size, I'd discard the idea of being a jockey

Last edited by jerrman; 09-03-2018 at 09:16 PM.
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post #6 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-04-2018, 12:31 AM
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You have one life don't waste it, wish you well.

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that does not grow in every ones garden.
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post #7 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-04-2018, 02:50 AM
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I feel for you Mike, I retired early last year (I was 62), but was lucky enough to have two final salary pensions that between them pretty much made up for my salary once I had stopped paying for fares and parking (£6000 per annum) and also had paid off the mortgage. I only kept working to ensure I had a big enough pension to maintain a decent standard of living.

In January an ex boss asked if I was interested in contracting, and I started doing that (having had to go through security clearance) in April. The only reason I went back to work was the quite frankly obscene amount of money I was being offered as a day rate. A year of this will make a huge impact on our standard of living going forward and allow a lot of enjoyment of life.

There are two "slap in the face" type lessons I have learnt in life. Firstly, my parents were of a generation that saved and worked (father worked for one company for life) and didn't spend. I got a work award a few years back that paid for a holiday on the Norfolk Broads, and my father had always said he wanted to do that but never did. In the end, it was only £500 and that wouldn't havee had any impact on their situation, it was very sad to think that I was doing what he had always wanted to do. Second, an old friend of ours said to us one night "there are no pockets in a shroud", and she was found dead in her chair at 63 about two months later.

As others have said, grasp the nettle - but not rashly. Do some research, work out your finances (the main reason my pensions pay is that I pay much less tax on them than I did on my earnings) because there's nothing worse than feeling under financial pressure. Life's for living, you work to live, not the other way round. The way employment is going in the UK with erosion of conditions etc, get out while you can.


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post #8 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-04-2018, 06:34 AM
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I jumped ship

I jumped ship Mike

I worked for one of the countries leading universities as course leader. Fantastic uni... unless you worked there.
Backstabbing, lecturers clambering over each other to lick the management's rear end and get a promotion.
Lies, deceit, it was all there. You couldn't trust anyone further than you could throw them.
Why did people stay? Because they didn't believe that that they could get another job 'so good'!
I saw people come in far less qualified and with laughable CVs and get promoted past - me by sleeping in the right bed.
So I walked
I got a job lecturing part-time at a less successful uni and did freelance work.
I did a great job and was given a full-time position.
I was able to offer experiences and knowledge from my old uni and improve my new place.
I still refused to kiss butt and retired once again as course leader on one of the countries best courses.
I even got invited back to the old uni as external moderator and courses verifier when they needed help.
Fascinating to see a lot of the old faces - still there - still waiting, but now clambering to polish my rear.

Just saying it is possible and life isn't a rehearsal, this is your one go in the circle game.

Last edited by chezqui; 09-04-2018 at 06:52 AM.
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post #9 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-04-2018, 08:04 AM
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Abso-freaking-lutely.... High cost of living area, been in my industry for 20 years, have to commute in traffic..... Way burnt out.

But, so far down this road and with good pay, hard to turn onto another road without major sacrifices....like NOT buying the Charger SRT I did a week ago...
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post #10 of 21 (permalink) Old 09-04-2018, 09:00 AM
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I had a major job change at 34 . . . and I had to start preparing for it at age 31 by going to Seminary. (I had basically Zero income for three years while I was working on my M Div. My wife taught school and got us through.) When I got my degree I was bound and determined to go into the Army but the Army wasn't sure. Eventually the Army brought me on active duty and I retired at 62. (I'm almost 72 now.) The switch was a big gamble but it payed off. I have a good retirement plan and health insurance that pays for just about everything. The career field that I had been in was textile chemicals. Textile chemicals in North Carolina went away 30 years ago. If I had stayed in textile chemicals I would be high and dry now.

I can't tell another person what to do but I can say that change is possible.

My dad stayed in the same job for his whole life. I basically had two different jobs in my lifetime. My son is in his 40's and he has already been a part of four different companies and has done well in each one. Times change.
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